You're throwing everything you have at me

"Aack! Eeek! Wow!

"Put that screwdriver down!"

How can something be semi-precious?
"You might be precious to me, but really, no."

"MEET DANITY KANE IN YOUR OWN CITY!"
I have my own city! Awesome!

I just heard a line in a movie that could actually benefit from the inclusion of the phrase, "In bed." What a weird world.

Remember that in surveys, there are no wrong answers. Just weird ones.

Heh... c'ain't.

Have you ever stopped to think of how many video games there are? The number might seem abnormally low, actually.

If there were 25 hours in the day, would you really accomplish anything more?

"My hangover feels like a nuclear explosion."
"My hangover feels like a million nails being driven through my skull."
"Well, my hangover feels like sobriety."

"What can you tell me about them?"
"Well, they're a person living on Earth. Their mother was a woman. Their father was a man. They have two eyes, two ears, a nose, a mouth, and common sense. They enjoy such activities as breathing, eating, and sleeping. Occasionally, they also like to sneeze."

If you look at a person with a psychotic abnormality, how much of their personality is the abnormality?
Say you had a friend whose abnormality caused them to be ever angry. Say they also got treated. They'd be like a whole different person, right?
Say you had a friend who had schizophrenia. What if they were the weirdest of your bunch; the one that always looks out for conspiracy theories? Then what if they, "normaled up?" What if they were just like all your other friends? They'd be like a different person, no?
Man... To think of the deeper issues...

How did "doing it like you've never done it before" ever come to mean something good?

"What kind of a score is sideways eight?"

Man, I just sent Charles quite a nasty letter. I know it's not ideal to post "happenings," but I can't wait to see how he responds.

"Do you have homework?"
"Yes... No!"

"It's the moan heard 'round the world!"

(The Friday before Spring Break)
"Friday's extra credit day. You get extra credit for showing up."

If you spend a lot of time recording your life, then you'll have a great record. But if you spend too much time recording, you'll have nothing to record.

I think, therefore I am. I eat, therefore I exist. I poop, therefore I stink.

If every bad day is a prelude to a good day, then does that mean every bad day is a good day? If so, then would there be any bad days? Would there be good days if all the days were good? Oh man, someone did not think that one through.

Something cool happened today. Someone finally reviewed me in Stumbleupon. Of course, this is far from being my final goal. It's more like a first step towards my final goal. Still... I've waited for so long, and it's finally happened. Might as well document this occasion somewhere.

"I shouldn't have called at such an inconvenient time. I forgot that time's off by 24 hours there."

"I just forgot how to spell the word awkward. This is so..."

When I achieve something, I feel good. When someone else achieves something, then I feel worse.
Now to make that rhyme.
"When I achieve something, all goes well. When you achieve something, my self esteem goes to hell."
Hey, it's a work in progress.

"Oh man, that kid's going to be devastated. Let's watch."

America sure is ignorant of the cons of capitalism. Why else would the Nigerian money scam turn out so well?

How can you save toucans just by recycling one can?

If its Myspace, why do I have to share it with you?

In another unlikely similarity, the B-52's sound a lot like the Jupitersheep. You really should listen to both, then compare the two. Not only are the lyrics somewhat similar, but the voices and the music sound alike. Perhaps there's more to this than I thought...

Hey... Why are there more views for my myspace blog than for my myspace profile? Is my profile page really that boring? I think there's something going on...

If your mother has three electrons, and your father has five electrons, how many electrons do you have?
Elements can't have babies, you dolt!

If you really think about it, I really wouldn't want to end my random thoughts blog with any particular entry.

Don't you hate it when people have a bunch of pictures of themself? I mean, I'm vain too, but I go for megalomania.

"Johnny was my father's name. Call me Mr. Drakenschmidt."

It wigs me out that Myspace let's people change their screename. There are people that reinvent themselves weekly. Seriously.

It takes a real writer to write in a bookstore.
(written in a bookstore)

I'm trapped like a rat in a paper bag with the top sewn shut and the rat's like, "What did I do to deserve this," and god's like, "nothing," and the rat's like, "aren't you discriminating against me for no reason?" and god's like, "yes."

Found in the fictional bookstore; Pride and hey, this is a book you could get for free on the internet, but I wouldn't want to Prejudice

What if the electrons for the element Lead spelled out the word Lead?
"Hey, you can't disprove it."

If I ever owned an apartment, I would have a sign that says, "Pets Welcome." But in the fine print, it would say pet rocks only.

Chipotle, or Le Chi Pot?

"Do not play connect the dots with your chickenpox!"

Old Sam worked in the endtrails department. For him, it was the endtrails that would entail the entertainment.

How to get into any college; A petty thief's guide to bypassing college security systems

Woo hoo, I'm celebrating 50 posts!
Wait a minute...

(I'm giving a presentation in French class. On the page, it says there are approx. 13,228,000 people in Burkian Faso.)
"Il est... (I see the number, 13,228,000) ...trop de gens au Burkina Faso."
[There are... ...many people in Burkina Faso.]

"1997 is now ten years from now. That wigs me out."

So, a man walks into a heavy metal bar. What does he say?
(This is a trick question.)
"Ow." -Wrong. He says, "Turn down this infernal racket."
"Turn it down." -Wrong. He says, "Ouch."

"Dude, you know Toucan Sam?"
"Yeah, he hangs with us sometimes after lunch."

"If there was a way to taste garlic anytime you wanted, would you do it?"
"Depends on the brand."

Am I the only one to see the similarity between Jurgic Rudkis (The Jungle, Upton Sinclair) and Boxer the horse (Animal Farm, George Orwell)? Jurgis' line, "I will work harder" and Boxer's general philosophy on life go hand in hand. I wonder if there was some inspiration going on...

It may seem like having to sign in to blogger might stop me from posting a few random thoughts, but it just gives me some time to refine them.

I know colleges give me a simple canned response.
...But sometimes I like to pretend it's not.

I was thinking of rejecting a friend request on myspace, because by accepting it, I wouldn't have neat rows of four anymore.